The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves
People seem to think that a movement toward body acceptance for women is going to make the obesity epidemic worse. People who push back against the fake images of rail thin women with implants, no body hair, no cellulite, and no creases regardless of how they are positioned, are sometimes accused of encouraging women to "let themselves go" or give up on getting fit.
The hilarious argument underlying this is, "People are heavyset because they feel too good about how they look; they will stop choosing to be fat if we make them feel bad about being fat." For those of you who are new to this planet, fat people are already treated shamefully in most situations, including medical settings, school, work, public transportation, and any time they are enjoying food.
So, either fat people have the most resilient self-esteem imaginable and we need to bottle it up and share it, or high self-esteem is not the underlying cause of the burgeoning buxomness of the average western nation.
From my own personal experience, as someone who has had more than a small number of children, my worst eating and exercise habits were driven by me hating my alien postpartum body and not feeling like it made any difference if I took care of it. My best eating and exercise habits came about after I read the line, "Don't workout because you hate your body, but because you love your body."
Around that time, I went to a funeral and saw my then 98-year-old grandfather standing near his 95-year-old brother-in-law. My grandfather was heavily stooped with osteoporosis and had a walker. His brother-in-law was short but trim and still had the posture of a marine, wearing a suit that I imagine must have been tailored for him decades earlier, based on the color. He carried a cane that he didn't use and had the physical grace of a 30-year-old runner.
It hit me that I come from a long-lived family for the most part. If I live as long as my grandfather, I am not even 40% of the way done with my life, and yet I hear some people just a few years older than me saying, "Oh, you can feel it as soon as you turn 40," and "Forty hits different." (Please send me some bitcoin to thank me for resisting the urge to pun there.) People moaning about how youth is wasted on the young seem oblivious to the fact that seniors look at them as young and see them wasting these key years to build their health, wealth, and relationships.
I decided to start caring for my body for the sake of being comfortable in my old age and that changed everything. No longer working for short term gains or shallow appearance-based goals, it was easier to exercise regularly and internalize that as part of my core identity. I'm not "trying to get into shape." I am someone who exercises because that's good for me. I eat real food because it's delicious and will support my best health. I sleep way more than I used to because that's critical.
Saying these things has helped me heal my disordered relationship with food, exercise, and my body:
~I'm someone who takes care of herself.
~I'm worth taking care of.
~My body is good.
~My body is a gift.
~I love having this body that helps me experience life on our insanely beautiful planet.
~I love that my body forgives me for what I did when I didn't know any better.
~My body loves to heal.
We know that shame doesn't help people lose weight. Your body wants to be on your side. It's time to shut out every lying liar telling us our bodies are not good enough and listen to the truth: our bodies are good and taking care of them is an act of love.
